New Year's is the time of resolutions. Resolutions that start out strong and often begin gathering dust well before Valentine's Day. This often leaves us feeling like a failure and hopeless that we'll ever change. The problem isn't the Resoluter. It's the Resolution. It's both the goal we pick and the way we think about change that sets us up for failure.
This year (what a year!), let's try something different.
The other issue that sets us up to fail is that we choose goals based on our fears about our worth. Behind "this year, I'm going to lose weight," is "I'll be more worthy/good enough when I lose weight." Our deepest self wants to know that we are worthy/good enough just as we are. Perhaps these fears about our worthiness fuel our eating, spending, or disorganization. What if, this year, the goal was to love yourself more exactly as you are? What would that look like? How might you behave if you truly felt your deep, inherent worth? There are some resolutions worth making…and keeping.
Karen J. Helfrich, LCSW-C
As a therapist, mother, daughter, partner, and seeker, I am always on the journey toward a more peaceful, authentic life. I hope to share knowledge, insights, and the ongoing unknowns I find along the path...